Have you ever felt lost, flat or completely deflated in your career or business? Or sometimes, even in your life?
We’ve all been there: sitting next to friends at brunch when one turns to the group and says, ‘Did you hear You-Know-Who got promoted…again! I should really be at that level by my age!’ ‘Wow you’re publishing your third book in two years? Amazing!’ ‘You’ve got how many Instagram followers? Really?’
If so, chances are, you have fallen victim to what I call the Comparison Conundrum. You know the one. Where we think, wonder and often envy how someone else seems to have their life totally sorted.
We watch from the outside (on our devices or from the other side of the ‘mask’) wondering how they can possibly have a thriving career/business, travel the world, have an all-adoring partner, fabulous sex life, talented kids, is a picture of perfect health ALL whilst still maintaining a rocking social life and saving the elephants in Africa and refugees in Sudan!
The Comparison Conundrum is dangerous! It can make any of us feel as though we don’t ‘do’ enough, ‘have’ enough or are simply ‘not good’ enough. Which is completely untrue, of course.
Here’s the bigger issue, the more we waste our valuable time looking, envying and wishing we had what everyone else has (or at least allegedly has) the less time we spend establishing what we want and then doing the hard yards to get it.
So, here’s the deal. If you ever start to head down the Comparison Conundrum, take five minutes for yourself (yes, that means you have to quit Facebook stalking for that moment), grab a cuppa and jot down these three simple things:
- What do you want? Personally and professionally?
- Why do you want it? If you did get it, what would it give you?
- What do you need to DO to make it happen?
Before you start, take a moment to note what you already have (and I don’t mean material stuff). I mean the resources (internally and externally) you have at your disposal to help you get what you want.
Make a list of your own amazing qualities, attitudes, past experiences, skills and knowledge that you possess. Brainstorm the various people who you can call on for help – your support crew. Who else might be available to give you advice or feedback?
The Comparison Conundrum is easy to fall victim to, so if and when you do, quit wasting your time comparing yourself to others and shift your focus to you.
- What you have (and take a moment to be thankful for that)
- What you want and why
- And, importantly, what you need to do to make it happen.
Blythe Rowe has spent the past 13 years in Senior HR roles for some of Australia’s largest businesses including McDonald’s Australia and the retail giant, Bunnings. Blythe’s obsession for people and performance led her to become the founder and director of the training organisation, Human Incite.
